Wednesday, May 28, 2008

The Redneck Restroom

When we bought This D*mn House, unbeknownst to us, we inherited at least 1,000 yards of silver duct tape. The previous owners were in love with the stuff. It's like they were related to Red Green. (If you ever caught that show on PBS, you know he refers to it as "the handyman's friend.")It turned up in the oddest places.

Inside the kitchen cabinet to hold on a towel rack. Holding the cardboard in place that should have been insulation for the attic fan. Anchoring the heating duct in place in the dining room. And, my personal favorite: attaching a broken ball to the pump in the toilet tank. And that's just a few examples.

So it was with great disdain when I brought out the duct tape tonight to do a quick fix. And of all things, it was to do a temporary repair on the toilet seat. It cracked. And if you've sat on one in just such a way to get pinched ... not fun.

I have a spare seat someplace because we got an extra since the seat matches the beadboard with the same panel strip pattern in the bathroom. I just don't know where it is right now nor do I feel like dragging out tools to actually change it right now.

So, the toilet seat has the lovely added touch of duct tape. Nice redneck restroom I got there. But hey, at least the tape is white. Right?

6 comments:

notsosahm said...

When I sliced my finger cutting in the kitchen you know what my husband ran to get to bandage it up? Paper towels and duct tape. I guess it truly is a fix-all.

notsosahm said...

Oh yeah, a redneck wouldn't call it a restroom. It'd be the crapper, or more crassly, the shi**er. :)

NV said...

That's a great point! Frankly, restroom was the only R word I could think of to describe the "crapper." :-) Thanks to the previous owners, one of the sayings around the house is "When in doubt, duct tape it."

CD said...

My Grandpa loved duct tape and only in silver. When he passed away there were rolls of the stuff all over his house. The two pillars in front of my Mom's house are wrapped in duct tape and painted white. The house is over 100 years old and the pillars are showing no signs of wear and tear. He used it on plumbing, electrical, bikes, his recliner, TV antenna and cars. I have driven not one, but two cars in my life time held together with duct tape. One was a 1969 Ford Galaxy 500 in Army green with black vinyl seats. It was 1982 when my Grandpa allowed me to drive the car and the trunk was lined with duct tape. Not sure why till this day, but I was 16 and happy to have wheels. The next car was a Navy Blue Chevy Citation 5 Speed Grandpa bought me for High School graduation. This car had a little rust on the bottom and Grandpa duct taped over it and colored in with a navy marker. I never asked why on either car, was just happy to be able to pick up NKV from the Red Foxx. It's a good thing both of those cars can't talk!

NV said...

CD --Well, if duct tape was good enough for Grandpa, it should be plenty good enough for me. :-)

I am eternally grateful that the power of duct tape held together those two vehicles for they rolled through some of the greatest times and memories of my life. I am equally grateful, however, that those cars couldn't talk. What happens in the Galaxy (and the Citation) stays there. Much like the night you tried to teach me to drive a stick ...

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