Surest way to know I’ve hit the lottery: Every piece of yard maintenance equipment I own will be sitting curbside for the taking as I will never touch it again. If you know me in the real world, or even if you’ve been reading the blog for a while, you know how I loathe, hate and despise yard work.
I come by it honestly. When I was a kid, my grandfather (Young Tom) would always say that you should only do one thing with a yard – blacktop it and park on it. Technically, that’s two things but you get the idea. The older I get, the more sense that old man makes.
In one of the towns where I used to work back in my newspaper days, one of the local funeral home directors would spray paint the grass out front green every fall so it would stay that way until spring. This thought occurred to me over the weekend after I’d finished mowing and was thinking how fab it would be to be able to shellac the yard since it’s all cut and trimmed now. What a fantastic product that would be!
I guess that thought wasn’t too far from my mind when I saw this post by our friends over at Charles & Hudson. And what’s funnier still is that the mother had even quipped to me: “There’s always Astroturf,” when I suggested the shellac! And while this isn't that per se, it kind of is -- only on steroids.
I can’t see me shelling out thousands of dollars to replace fake grass that’s only going to last a few years. And especially not stuff that requires three inches of underlayment! No, not more digging after last year, thankuverymuch.
I guess I’ll just keep gritting my teeth and stick with my weekly mowing adventures. Unless I could hit Mega Millions or Powerball. They are both over $100M this week. To steal a line from Judy Tenuta: "It could happen."