Life After Tuesday

It’s amazing to me what a difference just 6-7 degrees can make. Yesterday morning, it was 41, I had on a real coat, and I was COLD. Today, it’s either 47 or 48 – depending on which news source you believe – I have on a rain jacket and a ¾-length sweater and I’m comfortable.

It’s also amazing to me how when I’m in a bad mood, it’s like the universe conspires to aggravate me. I was not in a good mood last night. Yesterday was something of a disappointing day as a week’s worth of efforts didn’t seem to move me anywhere. (I tend to be among my harshest critics, so to say I felt as though I’d failed would be a gross understatement. Did I mention, I really don’t like to fail.)

I went through a drive-thru and stopped to grab a few other items on a quick run uptown after work. When I got home, I quickly changed clothes and was preparing to sit down to eat. Before I could, the mother unwraps her order to discover that the one thing I said NOT to put on it is the ONLY thing on it. I grabbed the receipt. It was correct. The order was not. Had it been mine, I’d have sucked it up. But it was the mother’s. Enough said.

Back I went where I presented my receipt and asked for the sandwich I had ordered. Luckily, they were apologetic as opposed to antagonistic as some fast-food folks are when something is wrong. I might have gotten medieval with them otherwise.

Then, there are times that the mother just will not listen to me. Last night was one of them.

She was trying to find out when “Life After People” was going to be on. I knew she’d seen the prequel to the series that debuted last night, so I looked to see when the series was starting. 9 p.m. (Me, I could give a sh*t less about life after people. If we get to the point where there are no people on the planet, this impacts me, who obviously is one of the people no longer there, how?)
The mother scrolls through the guide menu and sees that "Life After People" is on from 7-9 p.m.

TM: Hey, I thought you said this wasn’t on until 9.
NV: No, what I said was that the series isn’t on until 9. This is the precursor to the series. You already saw it.
TM: But this says it started at 7. (She points to the onscreen description: Life After People, 7-9.)
NV: Right. It did. It’s the one you’ve seen.

At this point, I grab my remote (we each have one) click to the menu and show her where the one is that starts at 9. She reads the description.

TM: Well I haven’t seen that one before.
NV: No, you haven’t. No one has. It’s the series debut. It’s the first one in the series.
TM: But you said it didn’t start until 9. I haven’t seen that one.
NV: It doesn’t start until 9.
TM: But it’s on – now.
NV: No, it isn’t.
TM: Yes, it is. (She clicks to the channel where the two-hour precursor that she has already seen is on and in progress.)
NV: That is the part that you’ve already seen. The series, which is new, starts at 9.

This goes on for another five minutes during which she tells me there’s all kinds of things they haven’t discussed on this show, like what happened to all the people. Well, reading the series debut description, the bodies are something they’ll discuss.

TM: They haven’t talked about that yet.
NV: Right. That’s on tonight’s show, on the series premiere.
TM: Did you say that’s on at 9?

I want to yell: Yes – only 60 times in the last 10 minutes. Instead, I beat the remote control against my forehead. Perhaps this is why I didn’t have children.