Itchin’ for a Kitchen

The topic hasn’t been breached in a while, but, redoing the kitchen came up again last night. The mother restated her desire for new appliances, though I don’t know what we can get when she was stuck so unwaveringly on this model, an appliance that will not fit in This D*mn Kitchen.

I should have seen this coming, what, with the sighs followed by, "I wish my kitchen looked like that," whenever any HGTV show sports a nice, new kitchen, complete with stainless appliances.

I’ve yet to measure using this formula I found online to get a rough estimate as to what we need for countertops and she wants to go to some shop in a nearby town and look. I have no idea if $39/sq. ft installed is cheap for granite! (Somehow, she seems to think I know all this stuff as if this information should fall as trippingly from my brain as the questions seem to from her lips.)

OK. My brain is trying to add this up as we go. New appliances. Paint or stain for the cabinets. (We already have the new hardware for the cabinets as well as the sink fixtures.) New sink and countertop. And we haven’t even discussed flooring yet. I’d love to get ceramic or marble but I worry about putting that much weight down. D*mn. This is getting expensive fast.

“But I have to get my ceiling first,” she said suddenly. Huh? The Michelangelo Project likewise has been a non-discussion topic for a while. It, too, seems to be front-burner again. Of course it is. It is the mother’s preferred approach to projects, the one whereby there is complete and total chaos.

Nevermind that the family room is now jam-packed with supplies for her bedroom and mine, and the storage shed, as well as an assortment of yet-to-be-painted gingerbread for outside.

Oh, and lest we forget TWO pieces of furniture for said familyroom that are in need of assembly as is the new mantelpiece, that also needs to be stained. And, as an extra project bonus, the downstairs ceiling needs to be patched from adventures in electricity and the closet, built more than a year ago, still needs to be trimmed out. I’ve now made myself tired, just contemplating all of it.

By all means – let’s start on the kitchen. We don’t have anything else to do.

Speaking of kitchens … If you aren’t already a follower of Jayne over at The Kelly House (formerly Dainty Digs) now is a great time to start reading her adventures. Unfortunately for Jayne, weather has sidelined her porch and kitchen projects. Unfortunately for the rest of us, it also halts the adventures of Jayne and her ex, Mare, who is helping her with these efforts.

They’re on hold ‘til late next week.

Luckily, there already are two installments in what I dubbed Kellapalooza. And therein, I feel is also the beginnings of one hysterical play, or maybe even a sitcom, as Jayne has shown that her talents are not limited to her profession and DIY.